I receive a hug from an older gentleman every time I see him. You know me. You know I'm not a hugger. While this person is a friend, I know the reason he's hugging me isn't to offer support. It isn't to comfort me, because, if anything, it makes me UNcomfortable. It certainly doesn't have to do with me. It has to do with him and his male ego.
I never know which kind of hug I'm going to receive from this person. Sometimes it's a full frontal. Sometimes it's a side-hug. Now, the side hug is my least favorite and especially by this person because his hand is just a little too high on the side and tends to "squeeze".
So Sunday I not only received the unfortunate side-hug. I also received the butt-pat. 3 times. Side hug. Hand wander. Pat, Pat, Pat. In front of about 150 people. Don't ask me when that became appropriate, because in my book, it isn't. I was stunned into silence. No, he didn't get a high heel to the crotch, but I so wish I had reacted faster and drop-kicked him to the ground.
Later in the day, I also received a hug from another gentleman. Someone I'm not especially fond of and someone I don't really want to be hugging. How does a person look at me, with arm crossed across the stomach and coffee cup in hand, singing to Jesus, think, "Hmmm, there's Amy. Looks like she needs a hug". They don't. It's about them needing a hug. Why it has to be from me, I don't know.
My question to you is, how can I politely and inoffensively hug-block? I've pondered this
question the last few days and have not been able to come up with a solution. I know I'm not putting out the vibe to "hug me". If anything, I am doing everything in my power to convey that I don't want to be hugged. I could feign illness, but what if the person doesn't care about spreading disease? I've actually considered announcing that I'm gay just to get these men to leave me alone, but even that probably wouldn't work. You know how men's brains work. They'll make that even more tantalizing and sexual. Plus, I'm not gay and I'm pretty sure I'd be struck by lightning for lying in church.I'd like to do what Dogbert is doing in the picture. But I might be arrested. What's the solution here, folks?
4 comments:
Off the top of my head, I'd say to stick your hand out for a handshake when someone walks to you with the hug arms out. Aside from that, I don't know. What about putting a surly look on your face?
Put your fist out for a "fist bump." If they question it tell them you are trying to do your bit to keep from spreading the flu. Because you never know, you may be contagious and you certainly don't want them to catch anything. Men really aren't complete idiots. We know when someone doesn't like or isn't comfortable being hugged. At least I know and so they don't get hugs and that's okay. You may have to be very direct and bluntly tell them you don't think their hugs are appropriate. And if they don't like it, tough. My thoughts for what they're worth.
Ahhh, CricketsMama, don't I have a surly look on my face all the time? :) For some reason, that makes people want to hug me more. They feel sad for me. I'm liking the fist-bump because then I can punch them too.
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