Burton: You okay there? Christine: Yeah, it's my new date-night underwear. It just got to fifth base.

Have you seen the show "The New Adventures of Old Christine" with Julia Louis-Dreyfus?

I didn't watch it when it was on prime time but I'm addicted to it now. Lifetime and Fox play reruns.

I think the reason I like it so much is because I want to be Christine. I want to have her life. I want to have her attitude. She's crass. She's odd. She's hilarious. She drinks too much. She's screwed up and is o.k. with it. She lives with her brother. She dates. Granted, she has an ex-husband. I'm sure I could get one of those pretty quickly. Her child, on the other hand, I could live without.

This is the problem with t.v. I start to want what they portray, yet I know what's on t.v. isn't anywhere near reality. Nobody's life is actually like that.

But I'm going to try to make it happen. Stop calling me Kim and call me Christine.