"Let's face it, there's lots of spoiled kids out there...because you can't spank Grandma."-- Janet Anderson

My brother, Ben, and I visited our Grandma, Aunt Bev, Cousin Emily and children yesterday. It was the most fun I've had in a really long time. I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard my stomach hurt and tears were in my eyes. My face hurt by the end of the day from smiling & laughing so much. You just can't beat that. It was a great day.

Aunt Bev & Emily took time off from work to spend with Ben & I. Now, my brother & I aren't that exciting...we entertain each other just fine-- his laugh alone makes me crack up. But there isn't that much excitement in our lives to share with other people. I think our visit was something different in Bev & Emily's day instead of dealing with people who apparently can't walk, talk, or go to the bathroom once they walk through the doors of the Home. I was glad we could give them a break from that!

We're a card-playing family. Ever since I can remember, we've played cards. And it's always one of the best times of my life. Have you ever played spoons? Spoons are placed in the middle of the table (if 6 people are playing, then 5 spoons). Four cards are dealt to each player. The goal is to get a set of 4 (4 2's, 4 Queen's, whatever). The dealer looks at a card, keeps, discards or passes to the next player. Next player looks, keeps, discards or passes. And so on. QUICKLY. First person to get a set of 4 steals a spoon...quietly. Ben is a pro at this. Once someone realizes a spoon is missing, then it's a free-for-all. There can be blood. There can be broken fingers. It's a dangerous, exhilirating game. It gets the blood pumping and the laughter rolling.

And playing it with Grandma, Aunt Bev, Ben & Emily was hilarious. My explanation of comments made just wouldn't do them justice. I kept saying to Ben on the way home, "We should have videotaped that whole thing." Cause it was so darn funny. Here are my one-liners from the day:

Bev to Grandma: "Are you having a stroke right now?"
Grandma: "Did you bring something to blow up? Blow it out the other way."
Grandma: "There's a pole between my legs. That's both dirty & wrong."
Grandma: While throwing cards at Bev: "Dammit, dammit, dammit!"
Grandma: "My hands are vaseline!"

My grandma has no idea how funny she is, but just from the comments above, I think you get the idea. She is 80-some years old, lives alone in her own home, has very strong opinions about politics, Obama, christian radio and what's on television, and owns a gun....which she keeps in her bathroom to shoot out the window to her backyard at squirrels. She's hit a few, plus cats and possibly a stray child, though no one has reported a bullet in the leg that I know of. I suspect the woman will outlive us all....and we'll be visiting her in jail for shooting small animals and maybe children.

I will never forget this day.