"It would be good for me not to forget what it's like to be alone". -Me

It's Saturday. Craig has Jake. I'm sleeping at home, alone (with Elvis, of course) because I have to go to work again tomorrow at the butt-crack of dawn and I get too anxious if I'm not home to wake up.

I'm anxious now. I've been anxious all day. I was anxious at my nephew's b-ball game. I'm anxious constantly. I could take all the drugs in my private pharmacy and none of them would quell the anxiety. I hate this feeling. HATE. IT. Why can't I just be calm and relaxed? I could enjoy this one night alone. Instead, I can't even enjoy it because I'm anxious about work tomorrow.

The only thing that gets me through a work day is....it's one day....then I have 5 off. It's one day. It's 8 hours. I tell myself throughout the day, "Just make it to 8." ; "Just make it to 10" ; "Just make it to Noon".  If I can make it to Noon without having explosive diarrhea then I'm having a good day. Yep, that's a good day for me.

I do miss Craig, but I don't think my anxiety is about being apart. It's more about, what do I do with myself? I'd like to just go to bed. It's 5:15pm. lol. And I haven't eaten any dinner and I won't get any breakfast, soooooo, that's not good. I need Craig to cook for me.

He sent me an image of Tigger with a quote, "Once in awhile someone amazing comes along, and here I am!"

*eye roll* *sigh* *head shake*

I've got me a keeper, don't I? *smirk* because I really do. He is a keeper.

He even sent me a picture of himself to get me through the day. It helped. But I think tomorrow I need to be incommunicado. I get tired of constantly checking FB to see if he's messaged me. I feel like that Pink song I've mentioned several times before, "Have you ever stared at the phone waiting for the ring to prove you're not alone." Instead of a ring, I'm waiting for a FB message. It's frustrating.

I know I'll get to see him tomorrow night and I'm looking forward to that. Let me rephrase: I'm looking forward to alone time with him. Jake will probably be there until late (which to me means 7pm, lol) so I'll be looking forward to some alone time.

MMMM, on a quirky, feel-good, positive note, I was told today, "Amy, You're really wearin' those jeans". As in, I was really workin' 'em. Guess I looked good to someone. That always perks me up.