"Sometimes, we need a few people in our lives who will calmly call our bluff." ~Dr. SunWolf

In the early stage of our relationship (a week ago, lol) Craig implied a couple of times that we must want to be together so much because we've been lonely for so long.

It made me ponder that this morning. Are we together because we simply don't want to be alone or are we together because we really are that compatible?

We haven't spent a night apart for almost two weeks. That has to be some sort of record or something for me. But is it simply because we're bored and we crave company, no matter who's it is?

I asked Craig about it this morning. He told me he was just trying to understand how two people could come together so quickly and that was what he thought....at first....that we were just lonely. Now he thinks we're just great together. I ad-libbed there. He didn't say we're great together, but he did say we've got something more than just loneliness.

That led me to thinking, what characteristics do I want in a man and does Craig meet those? Am I with him because I'm simply lonely & bored or am I with him because he meets those characteristics?

I want someone funny and who can laugh at himself.
I want someone who's decisive & takes charge.
I want someone who's affectionate.
I want someone who cares about my needs and wants.
I want someone who won't put up with my bullshit and will calmly call me on it.
I want someone who's a good conversationalist.
I want someone who smells good. LOL  I swear, smell is my aphrodisiac.
I want someone who will be honest and not play games - just communicate well.
I want someone who doesn't think sex is everything in a relationship.
I want someone who doesn't mind my neuroses and will slowly try to get me out of my comfort zone, no matter how scary it is for me or how hard I resist.
I want someone who doesn't hate Elvis and who does love animals.
I want someone who's safe & secure.
I want someone who loves to kiss.
I want someone who can live without me but who doesn't want to.

I want someone who adores me.

I'm sure there are more characteristics but those are what come off the top of my head. Does Craig meet all of those requirements? No, but he comes darn close. I don't know if he adores me or not, but I know he sure likes me a lot. I wonder what his characteristics are and if I meet even one of them. Something to ask him....later. Not sure I want to know yet.

I know I'm not in this - whatever-it-is - just because I'm lonely. I could have hung out with a few other people if that were the case. No. There's something different about Craig as compared to those other men. He answered my call. He came over when I invited him. He wasn't afraid. He kissed me when I asked him to. He wasn't afraid. He's spent the night and me there almost every night for 2 weeks. We're not sick of each other yet. Yep, there's definitely something there more than just loneliness and boredom.

He picks up his child today after work and I'm either in a panic about meeting the kid or I'm in a panic that I might be without Craig for more than a day. LOL Which is just ridiculous. I sort of miss my bed with Elvis in it, but I think I'll miss Craig more.

Geezy lou, who am I?

I've become this other person. I used to love being home alone. Now I tolerate it. I used to hate being touched. Now I can't get enough of it. I used to be fine being on my own. Now I want someone in my life. This new me is a weird feeling. Maybe it's because I'm in the first relationship I've ever had, sober, that explains the changes. Maybe.

Or maybe I'm just ga-ga. Good thing I see my shrink next week.